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25 SIGNS YOU MAY HAVE BEGUN TO MATURE

June 29, 2006 by Marc Lamont Hill

My homegirl sent this to me the other day and I enjoyed reading it. I figured I’d share it with you. (Plus, I don’t feel like writing today).

1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can’t smoke any of them.
2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.
3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
4. 6:00 a.m. is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
5. You hear your favorite song in an elevator.
6. You watch the Weather Channel.
7. Your friends marry and divorce instead! of “hook up” and “break up.”
8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.
9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as “dressed up.”
10. You’re the one calling the police because those damn kids next door won’t turn down the stereo.
11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
12. You don’t know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.
14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald’s leftovers.
15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
16. You take naps.
17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.
18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 a.m. would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.
19. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.
20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer “pretty good stuff.”
21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
22. “I just can’t drink the way I used to” replaces “I’m never going to drink that much again.”
23. 90% the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
24. You drink at home to save money instead of going to a bar.
25. When you find out your friend is pregnant you congratulate them instead of asking “Oh Shit! What the hell happened?”

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57 Comments

1. Piscean Princess wrote:

#5 – happens all the time, especially in the grocery store
#10 – yeah, some of us have to work in the morning!
#23 – if reading blogs and their seemingly endless comments counts as work…

June 29, 2006 @ 12:33 pm

2. SammyBee = DIVATUDE wrote:

I swear by #22!!

June 29, 2006 @ 1:31 pm

3. omodiende wrote:

wow – every single one but #8.

June 29, 2006 @ 1:37 pm

4. RAD wrote:

#4 Oooh, 6 am is still way too early for me!
#11 Ewww!!!!
#16 My favorite past time
#21 Breakfast food is good anytime of day. That’s why they invented IHOP and the Pancake House!!!
#23 Ha! Yeah Right!
#25 Hilarious! Or, instead of asking “Well, what you gonna do?”

June 29, 2006 @ 2:23 pm

5. Afrikabelle wrote:

Wait, why can’t I relate? Hmmmm…guess it’s cos I’m only 19. WHAT? STOP HATING DAMMIT. I’m yoooooooung mofos.

p.s: I’m having such a bad day, I think I’m gonna go on and be depressed for like 100 weeks (and it ain’t cos Jay smacked B instead of me). So yeah, I think I may have lost a b-deal…I wanna like, DIE…okay folks, see you in 100 weeks. :(

June 29, 2006 @ 3:27 pm

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I’m not 19 you a**!!!!

June 29, 2006 @ 4:33 pm

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Before I respond, can someone help translate that for me?

June 29, 2006 @ 4:58 pm

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WAIT. Don’t touch Jay heifer. I ain’t THAT mad.

June 29, 2006 @ 5:00 pm

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June 29, 2006 @ 5:21 pm

10. ting wrote:

Sammy, the half a bar relates to Beyonce’s rhyme with Jay-Z where she deemed some women who were tryin to steal her man (frika), so insignificant that she only gave them half a bar in her song. tee hee hee hee

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Now Reading

  • Beats, Rhymes, and Classroom Life: Hip-Hop Pedagogy and the Politics of Identity by Marc Lamont Hill

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  • Born to Use Mics: Reading Nas's Illmatic by Michael Eric Dyson and Sohail Daulatzai

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Upcoming Appearances

February 25th - College of the Holy Cross (Worcester, MA)

Full of the Hope That The Present Has Brought Us

March 3 - Tulane University (New Orleans, LA)

The State of the Hip-Hop Nation

March 27 - Western Michigan University (Kalamazoo, MI)

Closing the Generational Gap

April 9th - National School Board Association (Chicago, Il)

Reimagining Urban School Reform

More Upcoming Appearances
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