Last night, the Philadelphia Phillies defeated the Chicago Cubs 6-2, pulling them into a tie for the National League wildcard spot. With ten games left, the city is suddenly buzzing with optimism about the Fightin’ Phils’ chances of making the playoffs, advancing to the next round, and playing in the World Series.

Surely, the evidence is strongly in favor of the Phillies. Our pitching staff is relatively stable, their bats are coming alive (Ryan Howard is a beast!), and the Dodgers are quickly losing steam. Also, five of the eight World Series teams, and three of the champs, in the past four seasons have been wild cards. All good news, right?

Now it’s time for a reality check: PHILADELPHIA ALWAYS LOSES.

As I’ve mentioned before, the city of Philadelphia is starving for a championship because we never win anything. And I’m not just referring to baseball. The Philadelphia 76ers, Eagles, and Flyers have also bungled their way to a title-free 2000s and 1990s, as well as most (or all) of the 1980s. Even worse, there is no end in sight.

The Eagles, who have never won a Super Bowl, appear to have missed their window of opportunity in January 2005 when Donovan McNabb hurled his Chunky Soup all over the gridiron. The 76ers, run by the second worst executive in the league (shout out to Isaiah Thomas!), are an inevitable Iverson trade away from another rebuilding cycle. The Flyers, who continue to throw millions at great players, refuse to recognize that their number one problem sits in the sky box not too far from his retired jersey.

As a fan, I’ve tried to relieve my pain by taking on pet teams: Jordan’s Bulls, Steinbrenner’s Yankees, Brady’s Patriots. I must admit, basking in the euphoria of other people’s success does momentarily stop the hurt (ask John Salley). Still, nothing can replace the joy of consumating a championship with your true love. Unfortunately, this year’s baseball season won’t bring me any closer.

Sure, the Phillies will likely win the wildcard spot. In fact, I predicted in March that they’d win 85 games and reach the playoffs for the first time since 1993. I would have to be clinically insane, however, to expect anything more.

And so would you.