Today’s video of the day comes from Miss Aisha Sekhmet. This controversial video has been spreading virally for days. While I understand the value of self-love and empowerment, I’m VERY disturbed by the use of sexist and homophobic language to make the point. We can love ourselves without hating others. *nsfw*

Cop gets away with animal cruelty because bestiality not considered “torment.”

Obama gives a shout out to same-sex parents.

Hey idiot, dumbbells aren’t gonna make THAT muscle bigger. Also: don’t masturbate while driving.

Evidently you can get pregnant while you’re already pregnant.

MTV still plays videos? Well, it won’t play these.

Kudos to JJG for finding this discussion on educated Black women and marriage rates.

Pachucas: women in zoot suits!

32 years later: Roman Polanski arrested in Switzerland for drugging and raping 13 year old girl

Health risks of the most popular birth control methods in the US

Into older men like George Clooney and Anderson Cooper? Check out this gallery of silver foxes.

Looking for a political scandal du jour? Try these pics of East Cleveland’s mayor, cross dressing.

Definitely not a kids’ bracelet.

Questions? Comments? Violent Reactions? Email Timaree at sexwithtimaree@gmail.com See more at SexwithTimaree.com

This week, I’m addressing three questions that people have been asking me all week:

Is it possible to avoid a military showdown with Iran?

Absolutely. Although Iranian President Ahmadinejad continues to thumb his nose at the United States and Israel by test-firing missiles and refusing weapons inspections, it is entirely possible to avoid a full-scale war. To do this, the United States and its allies must be willing to fulfill their promise of economic sanctions against Iran, which cannot function without healthy economic relationships with nations and financial institutions around the globe. More importantly, they must successfully enlist the help of Russia or China in order to make the economic pressure appropriately severe. While there’s zero chance of getting Chinese support, it appears that Russia is willing to play ball, especially now that Obama has agreed to scrap plans for building a nuclear shield in Eastern Europe. Contrary to what many have argued, Ahmadinejad is not crazy; he will stop developing nuclear weapons rather than setting himself up to be the next Saddam Hussein.

Isn’t it safe to say that Roman Polanski has only been free all these years because he’s white?

First and foremost, we live in a society that doesn’t take the protection of female bodies seriously. Part of the reason why 60 percent of sexual offenses against women go unreported is because of the indifference that many Americans, both men and women, have to rape. Another issue is class, as poor people rarely have the legal means or financial opportunity to escape in the manner that Polanksi did. Another issue is the power of celebrity, which allows many people to see Polanski as a world-class director rather than a child rapist. Is race a factor as well? Of course. After all, it’s safe to say that, in the exact same circumstances, Spike Lee would have been extradited decades ago. Still, race is not the biggest factor.

Doesn’t Obama have more pressing duties than going to Europe to get the Olympics?

At any other political moment, the idea of our president fighting to get the Olympics in our country would be a source of national pride. In the case of Obama, however, the narrative is being spun to seem as if he’s asleep at the wheel. In a world of high technology and global communication, I’m pretty sure that the president can do his job on the road. Besides, maybe this trip will stop him from making another prime-time speech!

Question to Sexpert Timaree:

“What do you think about these websites www.justdontwifeher.com or www.sugardaddyforme.com?”

Short answer: On the internet, everyone is free to let their douche flag fly.

You can whine about inane conflicts you’re too chicken shit to handle in real life, you can steal someone’s credit card information… and, using the sites you mentioned: you can also publicly ruin someone’s reputation or marriage. YAY for the internets! Hey, but at least it has this.

I’m a lover of the web. But it is, like all other media, a method for douchenuggets to be promoted to douchetenants, first class. Awesome people can be more awesome, and dirtbags get bigger megaphones while shadesters slink about more discreetly.

“JUST DON’T WIFE HER.COM”- AKA “I GOT MY FEELINGS HURT”

This gem of a site advertises its purpose as “Helping good guys by exposing Gold Diggers, Cheaters and Users One at a Time!” by posting the angry, racist, vengeful, tacky and horrendously spelled rants of men who feel they’ve been two-timed by women who just wanted their money or were sleeping with someone else. Oh, and celebrity gossip. It’s got a bizarre amount of news about the Kardashians and Kanye, as though it’s somehow related.

Rather than just telling everyone in the locker room that your ex is a dirty, nasty ho, you can tell the entire internet alongside an inevitably unflattering picture of the woman in question. The direct response is Don’t Date Him Girl, a collection of similar bitch fits about asshole guys, advice columns and shopping. If you’ve got an IPhone, the Date Check app serves the same function. Like a Google for bitter people.

On one hand, it’s theoretically handy. I mean, we check out hotel reviews before booking for a single night. Why not look into our potential sex partners? But these sites are far from moderate, dispassionate assessments of past romances. They’re bathroom stall scrawls with jpgs attached.

“SUGAR DADDY FOR ME.COM” AKA “TURNS OUT I DON’T HAVE JOB SKILLS”

It could also be called “Having Relentlessly Sought Money My Whole Life Means I’m Super Awkward Socially.” This corner of the web, including its subsidiaries, and many, many, many, many competitors deals with arranging for hot young people and wealthy (presumably older and less attractive) people to have romantic entanglements that are mutually beneficial.

The idea is as old as the institution of marriage itself, so these sites are just streamlining sexual economics and gender roles as humans have known them for time immemorial. As I’ve mentioned before, these sites are catering to a personal preference to put physical appearance and/or money in front of other means of determining compatibility, something that you’re welcome to do, if you so desire. In fact, I applaud these folks for knowing what they want and stating it outright. We should all be so upfront about our wants and needs.

There are two different directions into which such sites can diverge: 1. the Shiny, Less Shady Excuse for Sex Work route where young girls lay out how much they want and old dudes pick mistresses like sweaters in a catalog and 2.the Cheating 2.0 route. In this second vein, married people can hook up with singles or other married folks seeking a thrilling, life-affirming, but potentially very expensive adventure.

Again, there are plenty of different sites out there, ready to introduce you to the wonderful man or woman who will later be called to testify at your divorce proceedings.

I’m all about letting people make whatever sexual decisions they bloody well please and respecting everyone’s right to self determination. But not at the cost of anyone else. That’s why I’m fine with the sugar baby/sugar daddy sites but not with the cheating ones. There is collateral damage: innocent duped spouses who are lied to and potentially exposed to sexually transmitted infections. Not cool. I don’t care how sex positive and audacious sites like Ashley Madison and their ilk may be. By god, if you want to be a slut, be a slut. Be the most outrageous, whore-tastic, horny toad of a slut you can be. But be ethical about it. Don’t lie to people, don’t break your promises and don’t encourage others to do those things either.

IN SUMMARY

You’ve broached the subject of exaggerated gender roles and sketchiness as enabled by the convenience of the web. Even with the speed and impressiveness of today’s methods, being an asshole is still being an asshole. Do what you want, but your rights do not include ruining things for other people. Besides, divorce can be muy awkward.

Questions? Comments? Email sexwithtimaree@gmail.com. See more at http://sexwithtimaree.com

Today’s video of the day shows Rev. Al Sharpton’s appearance on WWE Raw. Thoughts?