1. booklover17 wrote:

I wholeheartedly agree. I have a friend who doesn’t tip. I will only go out to eat with her when I take her out for her birthday. I have had discussions with her about tipping and she makes the same ignorant comments that this blogger makes.

2. Ann wrote:

to the chic in the video: COLE YOU STUPID……

She talking like he ought to be grateful that she even paid for the food. Just ignant!!!!

Lastly she talking about they should have automatically added the gratuity..yeah right then she would have complained about that…

she should take her ass back to TACO BELL

3. DCI74 wrote:

Perhaps she was going to make her point but I couldn’t listen past 2:37 into the video, the sound of her voice became increasingly annoying. I agree with you Ann she completely contradicts herself by mentioning the Cheesecake Factory. The 2 oddest moments for me, (1) she called herself and the other black people “colored” umm what year is this again and (2) what was the relevance of pointing out the racial demographics of the other people eating, definite smh moments.

4. zak wrote:

I knew where it was going in 15 seconds

20 percent, people. I tip 20 percent, or higher if I really like the service. I hate it when people don’t tip…and 8 dollars on a $160 tab is not tipping. If I was that waiter I would take that change right back to her and say “you obviously need this more than I do.”

5. ~JJG~ wrote:

I have no words. . .I can’t believe this chick stuck her middle finger up and mooned us in protest of tipping. Mad ignant.

I can’t stand people who don’t tip either. I have a friend that I argue with about tipping all the time. I glad we only go out together once a year. She’s the same friend who felt that another friend should pay the whole price of two meals because she had the coupon for the half off discount. It was her coupon she declared. Aren’t you supposed to split the bill in a case like that? They fell out for a few years over that. LOL.

6. DCI74 wrote:

I think there is one word that summarizes her mentality and those like her: entitlement. The ironic thing about a sense of entitlement as it relates to customer service is it’s shared by both the very rich and the not so poor. I know how it feels to be tip-earning server and a hungry-ass impatient customer but the one thing I have come to understand is that in 99% of the times I eat out, the server is without question doing the best that they can. I understand that things happen in the kitchen that can either mess up an order or delay it completely but if my server is keeping me abreast of any problems and putting forth some effort to alleviate the situation then I’m good. But I’m not going to make the server jump through stupid hurdles just so I feel they can “earn” their tip. I’m prepared to routinely drop 20% before I even walk inside and that’s for adequate service. If there were problems and attempts were made to get it fixed then I won’t consider giving less than that, unless we’re talking obvious rude and ignorant behavior then I’m not only requesting to the see the manager but I also will request a new server. If the service was exceptional then they will definitely get more than 20%.

If I even have to have just one conversation about tipping with anyone that lasts more than 10 minutes I will never eat out with them again.

7. zak wrote:

DC,

Amen.

8. Mrs. Rivers wrote:

this is so embarrassing. Why she gotta be from LA! lol
i automatically give 20% @ restaurants, at the spa, getting my nails, done, etc. If you cant give a decent tip (which is at leat 15%) then, you should probably order fast food or Sizzlers…

9. sean prater wrote:

By her own admission,she couldnt afford to tip more than eight dollars which tells me that if you have filet mignot tastes but TacoBell money. you should only eat at TacoBell. this chick is an insult to black people the world over!

10. Mr. Allen wrote:

I know that its a hidden rule in this society today, but if you pay for a meal that is a high price why should you leave a tip? I mean nobody told you to take the job in the first place. Secondly, it should be required by law that they get paid minimum wage instead of slave labor. We must not depend on the benevolence and kind heartedness of other people to help us with our bills. I personally only leave a two dollar tip anytime that I go to a restaurant no matter what the tab is. If you dont like it get another job.

11. jazzy wrote:

She was wrong for her shitty tip but it was completely inappriopriate for the server to chase after her. Also, when did 20% become the tipping standard? 15% is my starting point and anything above that is dependent on 1) really good service 2) how i feel that day. 9 times out of 10 I do end up leaving a tip bigger than 15% but I hate that people are being to expect that the tip should automatically be at least 20%. In fact I hate the whole idea of tipping. Waiters should get minimum wage and food prices should just increase to accommdate that and then servers don’t have to wonder if they’ll get enough tips to pay their electric bill.

12. Cézsar wrote:

Look, waiters and waitresses get paid to do a job, just like everybody else. I don’t get tips for keeping my company’s computer networks running on top form, and believe me – that’s a lot harder, more complicated and mentally challenging and draining; and neither do you, whatever it is you do. Tips are entirely optional and I would gladly tip anyone time and time again if they kept on providing me with good service. But to be pressured into giving a tip, or made to feel like some sort of social deviant for not giving one is not only absurd, it is diametrically opposed to the very idea of tip giving and renders the gesture null and void. If you think your pay is shitty, then get up off your ass and get yourself another job, no matter what that involves. People who sit around waiting for society to tip them a living wage are generally referred to as…beggars.

13. james wrote:

cezsar, expecting a tip for a service is not any form of begging. also, just because you say that keeping up a company’s computer network is harder than being a waiter doesn’t mean that i necessarily believe you. to me, a busy restaraunt could be equally as challenging and draining. regardless, your pay structure does not consist of getting tipped. believe it or not, cezsar, some people actually enjoy working in restaraunts, and many people count waiting tables as their career of choice.

jazzy, you are cheap. get used to it. 20% should be the norm if you can afford to eat out. i usually tip higher than 20%, especially if the bill isn’t that much. i had breakfast at friendly’s last sunday. the bill came to 14.64, but i signed for 20, the tip being 5.36. (not being terribly good at math, i usually round up to nearest 0 or 5 that makes any sense for a tip.) was the service great? probably not. was the food awesome? hardly; i’m still regrowing the skin on the roof of my mouth from the very hot potatoes. i am, however, usually quite grateful to be eating out, as i view eating out to be luxury in my life.

14. booklover17 wrote:

“i’m still regrowing the skin on the roof of my mouth from the very hot potatoes”

lmao–I hate when that happens. Oh and good anwer.

15. DCI74 wrote:

Come on Cezsar I know you’re smart so to compare you computer job to that of a waiter is insane, they are 2 completely different job classifications. You don’t get tips because that is not they way your job was designed but you know damn well if it was within your rights to walk around with a tip can while servicing computers you would. Part of the experience in eating out at a fine restaurant is the fact that everything from your food to your drinks are brought to you otherwise you would see a tip jar on every counter at McDonalds and Burger King. If you don’t want to even think about paying a tip for food stick to the drive-thru spots.

But Cezsar since you and Jazzy are so against tipping do you both apply the same perspective when dealing with bartenders, cab drivers, airline staff, barbers, baby sitters, spa/salon workers, valets, bellhops, limo and hotel courtesy drivers as well? So because tips are part of their income are you saying they are all beggars?

16. Clif Soulo wrote:

I’m not against tipping, but I don’t tip 20%, not unless the service is outstanding. I usually hit em with 10%. But if the service is terrible, they not getting a tip from me, doesn’t make sense. they get paid to work there, tip is showing we appreciate the good customer service. atleast to me.

17. james wrote:

no clif, a decent tip is showing that you understand how the american restaraunt industry works. 10% is ignorant. 10% is cheap. contrary to popular notions, waiters and waitresses are not auditioning for tips. a good customer will always get good customer service. and when i don’t get good service, i still leave a generous tip, but i never–i mean never–return to that establishment. if you can’t afford to tip decently, perhaps you are eating out too much.

18. Cézsar wrote:

James, it is not a question of belief – many people do choose waiting tables as their career of choice, and rightly so, for it is as noble and honest and useful a job as any other…and it is not less than but not as complex as Systems Engineering. But that’s beside the point. My point, if you understood it, is that tipping, by its very nature, is also a choice. A free choice based on arbitrary and random kindness. It is not a duty, it is not an entitlement, and any form of pressure to do it, whether social or psychological renders the gesture void and hollow. That is not to say that you should or shouldn’t do it, it is just to say that it is a choice. A truth not lost on restaurateurs the world over, which is why labour, production costs, ambience, food craftsmanship, creativity, Value Added Tax and, lest we forget – SERVICE CHARGE – are already factored into both the price of the food before you even order it, and the final bill at the end of the meal. So, not that any extra proof is needed, but you can see for yourself how tipping is very much a choice.

Any waiter on whom this truth is lost has no business choosing waiting tables as a lifetime career. Knowing what you’re getting yourself into is the responsibility of every individual when choosing a career. And what about the restaurant owners turning over hundreds of thousands and millions of dollars a year? Is it yours and my responsibility to pay their staff living wages, after we’ve paid our bill, or is it theirs? That kind of shifting of moral responsibility is dodgy at best. It’s funny how the “House” always wins. It can be your choice, but certainly not your responsibility.

DC, the above is in response to you also. Oh and, only those whose dedicated life plan is to wait around for society to tip them a living wage run the risk of being referred to as beggars.

19. james wrote:

cezsar, perhaps to a person of lesser intelligence, waiting tables could be equally as complex as systems engineering.

tipping, in the american restaraunt business, is not a choice. it is customary and expected.

20. Abby Reikow wrote:

I understand (kinda) about where Jazzy if coming from, but as a current server, I can go to the bank, to shop for clothes, to a bookstore, etc etc and no matter how inadequate the service – those employees get paid the same amount. So shouldn’t I? Not to say that I give inadequate service, but once in a while I’m not on my A game, like everyone else, and I don’t think it’s fair I should have to suffer financially for it.
And as DC was saying, I shouldn’t have to jump through hoops (although I more often than not do). Its people like that I wish could work at Friendly’s Restaurant on a Friday when you’re out of vanilla ice cream and a cook called out. (And I used to work there so I know what that’s like). I would just sit back, watch, and enjoy my happy ending.

21. DCI74 wrote:

Cezsar since apparently you missed my question let me ask it again because nothing in your response addressed it all. You seem to be stuck on food service as if they are the only job class that has tips as paert of their income.

Since you are so against tipping do you apply the same perspective when dealing with bartenders, cab drivers, airline staff, barbers, baby sitters, spa/salon workers, valets, bellhops, limo and hotel courtesy drivers as well? Do you leave a tip for the maid who cleans your hotel room?

22. Andre wrote:

Setting the race back, one unleft tip at a time.

23. Cézsar wrote:

Pay attention DC. Read my posts again and substiitute “waiter” with any job title of your choice.

James, you seem to be having some sort of other battle which I can’t help you with. My point is made.

“Setting the race back?” Tipping now typifies racial progress and pride? Wow! You’ve obviously got issues Andre. Y’all are too funny.

24. DCI74 wrote:

Lol @ Ceszar, that was a cute response. You’re worse than Sean Hannity in your inability to answer a direct question.

25. james wrote:

actually, cezsar, i think andre’s comment was meant to address the stereotype of black restaraunt patrons, which goes like this: black people don’t tip.

the only point you made is that you are cheap, and you are attempting to justify your ebenezer-ness by falsifying some notion of choice in regards to tipping. there are instances where tipping can be a choice. for example, at christmas time, sometimes i like to give my son’s private drum instructor a little something extra for his work and dedication throughout the year. not much, maybe 20 bucks at best, but that’s my choice because it’s not customary or expected that i give him anything beyond his regular amount.

26. phil wrote:

Ya’ll trippin’… a tip is a tip and just that. It is a VOLUNTARY EXTRA payment. Whether you tip 5%, 10%, 15% or 20% or more is completely up to you; its optional and again COMPLETELY UP TO YOU!! I can almost guarantee you; if it had been me in that situation (without my wife) it would have been a lot more than a you tube video.
What gives anyone the audacity to chase someone out the restaurant to complain about a tip? Would you do it? The reason tips cannot be included on your ticket (they may put it on there at some places but it’s suggested and you always have the option no the RIGHT to have it removed) is because it is a tip; by definition alone a tip is NEVER legally required.
She mentioned it was her and two of girlfriends; they order fillet mignon she had a salad. C’mon, she wants to go out and celebrate her friends’ birthday with her. Maybe she does work at Taco Bell, who knows, the fact remains it’s a tip. For you and society and whoever else to say if you can’t afford the tip, you can’t afford to eat is beyond stupidity. When did you set the standard?
I think it was absolutely necessary to mention they were the only “color” people in the building. It shows why she was so upset and it does build a bigger picture.
As far as the finger and the butt; you say what you may but you best believe it was better for her to show her ass than act an ass; I can imagine what some of you would be saying.

27. james wrote:

oh, phil, now i get it; blacks don’t tip as a form of social protest: because blacks were brutally enslaved in america, blacks are entitled not to tip.

28. Ivianna wrote:

It is very common among black folk not to leave a tip. I used to go to a night club that was predominantly black and the the bartenders would make no money because the blacks would not tip.

29. phil wrote:

Not just blacks but everyone is entiltled not to tip. Its completely up to the individual is what I am saying. There is no law; you give your son’s private drum instructor something extra for Christmas, has the instructor ever ran back in your house got in your face and threw the 20 bucks back at you? I hope not and if so, that would probably be his./her last day on he job. 20 bucks is probably not even close to 20% percent of your bill for the year.
Besides, she is black and she did tip (maybe not what you thought she should have).
You missed the point; the black comment was only to somewhat validate why she even made the video. She is angry at the fact that the waiter call out (embarrased) the only black group in the resturant. If you are not black there are somethings you will never understand (and i will never understand some things white people go through). Sure its 2009 but black people still dont meet certain criteria and have certain privileges (eating at an expensive restuarant without leaving a tip). I am black and I have been blessed to grow up with litte and acquire much through hard work. SIDENOTE: When you have much, you give much.

30. james wrote:

phil, it is customary and expected to tip in an american restaraunt. if it weren’t, i wouldn’t tip at all. if tipping were “completely up to the individual,” i probably would not tip. tipping is not just a polite way of recognizing good service. for many service workers in the united states, tipping makes up the majority of their income. if tipping were “completely up to the individual,” there would not be so many guidelines for it. for example, i’m headed to paris in a couple of weeks, and you can bet i’ll be looking into the tipping standards and customs associated with various services in paris. yes, while not tipping is not usually against the law, you are abusing your waiter by not tipping he or she generously.

31. phil wrote:

Just look at the definition of the word. We have guidlines for many different things that are up to the people. You ever watched a stripper dance? Do you give him or her more money the harder they shake? Its expected but not required; those are the guidlines.
yousaid “while not tipping is not usually against the law, you are abusing your waiter by not tipping he or she generously.” NEWS FLASH – NOT TIPPING IS NEVER AGAINST THE LAW (in America I dont know about Paris). Also does that apply to waiters only? You sure as hell didnt tip your son’s drum instructor generously, are you abusing him or her?

32. james wrote:

phil, i don’t think you understand the example of tipping my son’s drum instructor at christmas time. it’s more of a small christmas gift than a tip. and while it is becoming more customary to gift/tip certain people who provide you services all year long, it’s not expected; it’s more of a personal choice than what is involved with restaraunt services in america. that was the distinction i was trying to make with that example.

strippers will generally be happy with anything you can afford to put in their g-strings. however, they will always exhibit the most sexual energy for their regular and more generous clients.

33. phil wrote:

lol… I agree they work hard for their money. I missed the correlation you tried to make since you said “tip” and not “gift”.
No matter how anybody tries to sell it, the waiter was wrong. The FACT remains the same. Please define the word tip for me.
Its been fun talking with you.

34. Cézsar wrote:

Aha! Give a man enough rope…

James, you poor poor boy. I told you “you seem to be having some sort of other battle which I can’t help you with.” And is if on cue, you expose exactly what your beef is – and it’s got nothing to do with tipping. You didn’t just play the race card – to make a trivial point about tipping (talk about overkill) – you played the racist card!

“…blacks don’t tip as a form of social protest: because blacks were brutally enslaved in america, blacks are entitled not to tip.” – This?! Is your case winning argument for whether or not tipping is a choice? Oh my God! What a tea-bagger you sound like, or are you just a birther? Don’t answer that, it’s all the same thing anyway. You had no credibility to begin with, now you have even less. Seriously dude, to tip or not to tip – that is the only question at hand. Take your hardly concealed racial issues to a head doctor or sum’n. I told you you had issues.

35. wouldn't you like to now? wrote:

This post just put a microscope on all the cheap ass patrons of the barbershop.

Ps- HEY Y’ALL!!!!!!! missed you guys a bunch!

36. Cézsar wrote:

Oh and Phil, I applaud your patience in rebuffing this tea-bagger’s insane, illogical whining with obvious intelligence. And I can’t wait for his definition of a tip. That should be very interesting.

37. james wrote:

cezsar, black people are infamous for not tipping, which was the point andre brought up. i was just speculating on why, in a follow up to phil’s comments. i am neither a bagger nor a birther. i am, however, very curious as to why black people, on average, tip much less than whites. not tipping could very well be a misguided form of social protest, with similar roots to the reparation movement. i really don’t know; i’m just speculating.

why do you think black people don’t believe in tipping?

38. Cézsar wrote:

Oh you’re a tea-bagger alright. Don’t lie to me James. You and I both know that aint nothing more you love to do than some tea-bagging. And as for the little racial storm in a teapot that’s brewing inside you alongside them teabags, I’ve told you I can’t help you with that…you gotta take it to your shrink. You’re way off topic.

Back on topic, and speaking of head doctors, answer Phil man – define the word: tip. You can’t can you, without destroying your own argument and making yourself look foolish you God damn tea-bagger you LOL!

39. james wrote:

cezsar, you’re just being silly now….

it is a fact that blacks tip less than whites. it is a fact that most servers don’t want to handle the black tables that sit down to eat in their restaraunts. lack of tipping is generally the complaint from servers.

my webster’s new college dictionary defines tip, in the correct sense for this thread, as “a small sum of money, often a percentage of the total bill, given to a waiter, porter, etc. for services; gratuity.”

i fail to see how that definition destroys my argument. in fact, i’m not really having argument at all, am i?

40. phil wrote:

james… you said “my webster’s new college dictionary defines tip, in the correct sense for this thread, as “a small sum of money, often a percentage of the total bill, given to a waiter, porter, etc. for services; gratuity.”
Is 8 dollars a small sum of money? Was the lady in question black? Did she inded leave a small sum of money? I agree cezsar; i am sorry james but you have some other issues going on.

And you say “i fail to see how that definition destroys my argument. ” Man read the definition again and re-read what we are discussing. How do you fail to see how misleading your comments are?

james do me a favor; stand in front the mirror and look at yourself really hard and say “I am not racist.” five times. Let me know how you do; although I think I may already know what your response will be.

41. Cézsar wrote:

Ok so you’ve told us that a tip is gratuity, and not surprisingly – no mention of the words “customary”, “expected”, or “obligatory” – putting your argument in self-destruct mode. Now define gratuity.

42. Mark wrote:

…I agree with Marc Hill that if you can’t afford to tip, then you can’t afford to dine out at resturants; HOWEVER, for a resturant employee to run behind patrons (who were already in their vehicle…), aggressively expressing his displeasure over (their) failure to leave said tip is OVER THE TOP & UNACCEPTABLE, if not DANGEROUS. And not to pull the “race card”, but if Becky, Heather and Megan had not left a tip, would o’l boy have been as animated in his expression. Black people need to wake up and realize that our margin of (error), as WHITE PEOPLE see it, is very narrow…and the reaction/penalty for such (error) is sharp and swift. I, personally, believe in tipping; but if i choose NOT to, I WISH somebody WOULD come running after me talkin’ shit about it(!) It would be the LAST TIME he/she would be foolish enough to do such a thing…(and I ain’t talkin’ ’bout nothin’ violent, etc., but trust me, the situation would be HANDLED)

43. cjayconrod wrote:

I’ve worked my share of service-industry jobs, so I do understand the importance of tipping. Yet at the same time, I feel as though some servers believe that a good tip is obligatory, thus making exemplary customer service optional. If you want the tip, you better work for it. Give the best service you can and a great tip should follow.

44. james wrote:

phil, my comments are not misleading at all. in america, tips are customary and expected. not sure why you are calling me a racist.

cezsar, definitions of words are not usually enough to define the issue at hand. look up marijuana in my webster’s new college dictionary and you won’t get a whiff of the controversy surrounding its legalization will you?

gratuity and tip, in my dictionary, are synonyms.

perhaps blacks are not, as a group, cheap, but instead don’t feel obliged to tip because of their higher rates of poverty and unemployment? or perhaps they just don’t like handing over “extra money” to the mostly white waiting staff? perhaps if there were more diversity amongst the staff, blacks might tip better as a group? i really don’t know. these are just some questions i have.

45. phil wrote:

Yeah, I get it gratuity and tip,are the same in your dictionary; dont forget gift (20 dollar Christmas gift aforementioned). You should question yourself. Again, I ask was the lady in the video black? Did she leave a tip? Did you look in the mirror?

46. james wrote:

phil, honestly, i’m not commenting on the video at all. i didn’t watch the video. the video is obviously a prompt for a discussion about why black americans don’t tip properly in american restaraunts. at least that’s what i’m wondering. all i see in the mirror is handsome devil.

47. Cézsar wrote:

“…a whiff?” Really? Really? Please tell me that was not your best attempt at clever word play. LMMFAO! Oh dear, it’s far worse than I thought. I always knew you were a misguided tea-bagger but I never realised until now just how tortured and basic were your logic and rhetoric. Not to mention your elementary comprehension: asked to define a word, you make race the issue then complain about not being able to define an issue. How stupid is you? No intellectual purview yet you wan argue, look what your own argument does to you…

“james… you said “my webster’s new college dictionary defines tip, in the correct sense for this thread, as “a small sum of money, often a percentage of the total bill, given to a waiter, porter, etc. for services; gratuity.” Is 8 dollars a small sum of money? Was the lady in question black? Did she inded leave a small sum of money? I agree cezsar; i am sorry james but you have some other issues going on.”

…yes it destroys you. Maan look you can’t argue. I’m in a good mood so I indulge you. But the truth is you aint on my level so “poof!”, away with you…you silly tea-bagger you. Hahaha! What a grade A chump.

48. Corve DaCosta wrote:

This girl is just tacky. It is customary that you leave a tip when you dine. This is something one should think about before dining at restaurants.

49. phil wrote:

Corve… did you watch the video? The girl did leave a tip and if you think about it I am pretty sure there are some things that are customary that you dont do.

james… i want to be nice but i there isnt a nice word that comes to mind when trying to describe you.
You are so far off base its crazy. You said yourself (at comment #29) “if tipping were “completely up to the individual,” i probably would not tip.” and “while not tipping is not usually against the law”
then you (not webster) say (at comment # 40) tips are customary and expected.

So who decides if you tip and how much if its not up to you? As I stated earlier, not tipping is NEVER against the law.

1. you try to define what you believe “tip” means
2. you try to say black people dont tip
3. you try to say black people dont tip as well as whites
4. you say you didnt see the video but then state “obviously it is a prompt for a discussion about why black americans don’t tip properly in american restaraunts”

According to the definiton you provided via webster… i see nothing wrong with a 5% percent tip; i mean after all, it is up to the individual what they leave.

I remeber a couple of my friends went out to eat back when i was in college. We didnt have a whole lot of money so we put our change together after we paid the bill and left the waiter what we thought was a nice tip, (8 people and we left close to 30 bucks) she complained so we took it back and left. Was I wrong for that?

50. james wrote:

phil, in america, the percentage of tipping is determined by the server’s market. right now the market is anywhere 15 to 20%. being a good customer, you should strive to either meet the minimum or go above it. that’s pretty much it.

.

51. phil wrote:

There is no hope with you.

52. ARNEADER wrote:

Oh my goodness…..I always tip graciously, when I see the waiters…I just thank God that I don’t have to wait tables…because I know they are working hard for their money.

53. Doc wrote:

People working for tips are generally taxed for tips at a rate that assumes they were tipped 8% of their total receipts. When you leave less than 8%, you basically made the wait staff pay for the privilege of serving you. That is wrong, because they do not have a choice about paying taxes on their tips, anyone leaving less than 8% is self-centered and inconsiderate.

Cezsar, I happen to be the CIO for a sizable IT Operation, performance and holiday bonuses are completely voluntary (for me) and paid from my discretionary budget. Let’s say that I need to update my core switches. I can choose switch model A that is completely in standard and meets all of my networking needs, or I can get switch model B that costs significantly more. I arbitrarily decide to get model B switches and forego paying Christmas bonuses this year. Are you OK with that decision? You did your job, did it well actually; but you get a $50 company logo jacket instead of the $1500 bonus given in years past. Are you going to forget it because bonuses are voluntary and you already get a nice salary? Or, are you going to come to my office and gripe, tell people I’m an idiot because I spent all my discretionary funds on switch upgrades, instead of recognizing my emplyees, etc? Well, Cezsar, what do you say? What if your income tax assumed that you got a $1500 bonus every year and I gave you a jacket; are you OK with that?

54. DCI74 wrote:

@ james – ebenezer-ess is the funniest thing I’ve heard all week lol! Enjoy France man and tipping is very different over there than here. It’s normally included in the bill so you’re going to see “service compris” (service included) if the tip is included (min. 15%) regardless of the group size and “non-service compris” if it’s excluded.

55. Courtney Williams wrote:

Is tipping a folkway or a more in our society? I served some tables at Denny’s when I was an undergrad, and I always got tips. Even when patrons ran out on the bill they left me tips. Ruby Tuesday was different. One time these good sisters came in ordered like $56 worth of food and only had $54. I looked out for them. Then they asked for an application. I accommodated them, hoping they’ll get the job because being broke is not sexy. If I don’t have money for the tip I will not eat out, however, venues need to just increase the price of the food to cover the costs. Sometimes I might be wearing cargos and ACG boots with a champion hoodie. Figuratively I might not look like someone that tips, and this may affect the service I receive.

56. Courtney Williams wrote:

Is tipping a folkway or a more in our society? I had a few experiences at Denny’s where people ran out, but they left good tips. In an incident at Ruby Tuesdays these young professional women ran me around, and when their bill came they needed two more dollars to satisfy the bill. Overall if venues weren’t so frugal they could raise prices and pay waiters that way. If I don’t have tip money I won’t eat in, for I might get some take out…….Overall it should be against the law to pay somebody $2.12 per hour.

57. Andre wrote:

‘Sup party people. Sorry for missing out on the conversation. Truth be told, I’m not as frequent a reader on Marc’s site. In fact with this particular post, I simply checked out the vid, made a quick comment, left, and forgot about it. So, my apologies James and Cézsar…or anybody else who had specific questions about my comments.

To answer your question Cézsar, I was being more tongue-in-cheek than anything about “setting the race back” regarding the issue of tipping specifically. Among the laundry list of racially regressive issues plaguing the so-called “black community”, tipping is not something I prioritize. While bad tipping certainly has all the makings of stereotype propogation, I’m not really trippin’ on that. Instead, what bothers me (in all seriousness) is the unnecessary diatribe in this lady’s video and the negative social consequences black people IN GENERAL will face because of it. It’s one thing to be the bold and demonstrative patron speaking out about unsatisfactory service she received. It’s another to unapologetically, and (to be frank) vulgarly express to the world how ‘you ain’t gotta leave no motherf—in’ tip if you ain’t got it…’ while showing the world your ass in the process. As if black people didn’t have enough social conflict to deal with and to combat, our viral friend here just added one more shrimp to the barbie.

One of the unfortunate consequences of being a racial minority in this country is that we often find ourselves being dictated to by a subset of people. How many black people – good tipping black people – will have to carry the cross for this woman?

58. DCI74 wrote:

Interesting points Andre, so let me ask you something. Do you feel that all black people including the ones who are complete strangers to you and ones you’ve never met represent you when they do something that might be deemed negative and said negativity gains traction in the mainstream media? Since I’m black and I’m guessing you are too, although we don’t know each other at all do you think anything negative I do is a reflection on you and vice versa?

59. Andre wrote:

Hi DC,

In a perfect world, each of us would only need to be beholden to ourselves. But racial minorities were never afforded such a luxury. Now if you want to get down to specifics, I think it’s pretty obvious to state that I personally would not be affected by anything YOU did. As you stated, we don’t know each other; probably don’t live in the same area (I’m from Michigan), don’t frequent any of the same joints and won’t likely have our lives intersected at any point. But we both DO know other black people whose lives are directly (and perhaps unintentionally) affected by decisions we make…particularly, the negative decisions we make.

The most prominent racialized stereotypes assume the worst in people. Black folks are loud, ignorant, ghetto, and – apparently – bad tippers. Muslims are terrorists. Latinos are illegal immigrants. So on, ad infinitum. The only group in this country NOT monolithically defined are our white brothers and sisters (I mean, if white America was defined by the Jerry Springer crowd, we’d think the majority of white people ate squirrel for breakfast, slept with their sisters, and lived in W. Virgina…). Faced with the menacing reality that our negative behaviors are unfairly ascribed to the WHOLE RACE, the onus to combat that falls on us. So as unfair as it may be for us to be each other’s keepers (in the social sense), we have to.

60. Cézsar wrote:

A cursory glance at what you just said Andre, may very well give the appearance of reason and thought, but I have to tell you that your point of view is almost defeatist at its core. Think about what you said for a minute. When a compulsive rapist brands all his victims hoes, and says any girl oozing sexuality with a short skirt on is a slut and deserves to be raped and that’s why he rapes them, is it your assertion then my friend, that the onus is then on the girls to combat his deliberate and manipulative rationalisations? That’s a dangerous road to go down. Because don’t you see, women, in such a man’s estimation, will never be seen as decent, beautiful, intelligent beings to be loved and cherished until they are sleeping with him willingly and at his command. No amount of long skirts or even nun’s outfits will ever convince such a man. And so the onus must be on that man and that man alone. Or you will surely become his hoe.

Andre, you can carry a cross for this woman if you want to but I think it’d be far simpler and more enjoyabe to ridicule and rebuke to the point of penance, anyone who disrespects you on account of someone else’s actions. When you assume something about me, you make an ass out of yourself and I’ll let you know about it. When you arrogantly presume to know me, I’ll take relish in giving you an intellectual vivisection and exposing your ignorance. In other words I let everyone carry their own cross. I think you should do the same. If a person doesn’t want to be talked to sideways or laughed at, then they should approach me (or life more generally) from first principles; in other words assume nothing…except the intelligence of sentience, which we all have. That way, the starting point will always be respect.

61. Andre wrote:

Hi Cézsar,

That’s an interesting juxtaposition…not one I’d necessary use because I can’t see how victims of rape can be put in the same category as the bonehead in this vid. Still, I see your point. However…

…even some pyschologists indicate that potential victims should try to humanize with their attacker. By talking to them, engaging them, talking about their families, etc., may be able to increase the odds that a rape could be curbed. I’m not sure how true that it, especially when we ARE dealing with the compulsive types. But even the suggestion that women can empower themselves in those instances implies that the onus – even to a small degree – can be passed to somebody.

I appreciate the fact that you can brush off other people’s ignorance and stereotyping. But I’m not so sure most people have that kind of resolve. For one, it’s difficult to even TELL when you’re on the receiving end of treatment because of somebody else’s antics (i.e. I can’t tell if I’m being following by a security guard in a store because I look suspicious or because of what a few black teenagers did the week before). But even in circumstances where people are certain about the source of the ignorance to which they’re being subjected, that doesn’t always let the original offender – the one who gives bigots the fuel to BE bigots – off the hook.

That’s what I think anyway.

62. Cézsar wrote:

I can’t see why anyone would want to put the woman in the video in the same category as victims of rape. That would just be illogical. It’s a bit odd that you would suggest that given that “you see my point”. My analogy is quite approriate & illustrative given the specific point it was addressing – the one you made about “onus” and bearing the crosses of ignoramuses and responsibility-shifting, self justifying racists.

63. DCI74 wrote:

I hear what you’re saying Andre I just refuse to accept the notion that I am connected to the behavior of someone else simply because we share the same or similar amount of melanin. I am not responsible for the behavior of others, hell I’m not even responsible for what my siblings do but what they do and vice versa certainly impacts how my family as a whole is perceived but that has nothing to do with race and ethnicity, especially when I consider the fact that I have many non-black relatives in my family. So the familial bond totally supersedes any racial bond we may share.

Black people are not loud, loud people are loud, Muslims are not predisposed to terrorist activity but some terrorists have used their religion as justification for their actions but the same can be said about Christians (ie. Branch Davidians, Oklahoma City bomber, etc.). However I understand it’s the ignorant and lazy ones who will draw assumptions even in the face of clear and obvious logic. Having said that I won’t let the ignorance of others dictate how I live my life. As I said previously, I know what it’s like to wait tables and that perspective supersedes everything when I am eating at a restaurant. I don’t feel any additional pressure to make sure I tip generously because some feel black people don’t tip well. On the other hand because I’ve been a waiter I have an immediate understanding of how hard the work is and how important tips are to the overall income of a waiter. In those situations my blackness is irrelevant but my job experience isn’t.

64. Rockstar wrote:

This video is very embarrassing! I tip based on the service. 10% for bad, 20%+ for great….and what makes this situation more sad, is that there are plenty of ppl just like her running around, that just dont understand proper dining out etiquette. What can you do about it though, it just makes me want to SMH…I think the only way to compensate for ppl not tipping is to incorporate the tip in the bill….some places provide it for you, but it’s not many….